Fall Semester 2011

In two weeks, the semester of Fall 2011 would be coming to an end, furthermore, the last day of class is on the Friday, the 16 of December and exam week is on the week of December 19, 2011. At this rate, I am feeling both anxious, excited, nervous, and scared all at the same time. I am feeling anxious to know my grades in my classes, excited that the semester is coming to an end, nervous about how I could make the exams, and scared that I may fail a class. On the other hand, if I had review this semester, it may seem to be a somewhat-easy-slacking semester. There is a class specifically that I slacked off in, and it was Computer Science.

Computer Science, I love making codes on programs, but am not too certain how to do it. I don't get too much of a good grade on my quizzes too often and ended up with a C as my mid-term. Meanwhile my other three classes, I have all Bs. As said in my previous post about my Mid-Term grades, Computer Science seem to be the only difficult class, however, Calculus had taken over its role. I had just recently printed out the exact slide shows he uses for the class lecture.

Now that we are learning about geometry, which I was never good at it in high school, and doubt I will be good at it now. To me, it is only thing that is pulling me down in Calculus, so before the final exam of Calculus, I planned to first make my cheat sheet, which only involves formulas from the chapters we learn, he allowed us to have on exam day. And then study more on the geometry rather than the algebraic calculation. I am also confident with derivatives, so I doubted I would have to study on this aspect. When I count down from the hardest to the easiest, History comes to mind.

History, I have to study all of the key terms again, which I doubt I had forgotten. History, since first grade from the most vague description, I have still remember it till today. I am okay with the history that involves the the founding of America to the Civil War. And since the professor had already given all the students the essay exams we were expected to see, it makes me even more confident. Then I could beforehand write an essay involving the situation, which could result in me already answering the question to the essay. And I don't mean to say all these class are hardest from what I rate, but the English's exam will seem to be the easiest.

To me, our synthesis paper is the exam itself. And since it seems like a take home exam, I can write freely when I wish, rather than the two hour time the UW system has given us. Though it may seem like a 8+ pages essay, I find it rather simple. I elaborate a lot in my papers and when there is a maximum and minimum pages of paper, I have to cut down what I wish to write. All my essay, if I don't need to cut down on what I write, my pages of paper usually reach more than 8+ pages. Especially when the font is Times 12 and double spaced.

In all, I think the exam itself will be a piece of cake. Rather than just having 50 long minutes to do 5 Calculus problems, I have two hours to finish it in time. Also with my history exams, in all it would take me a total of 2 hour to actually make an actual good essay and key term identifier. CPS, the exam is usually hard, so I could possible finish it in one hour of time. He makes it simple with many mix and match question, short answer, and a single program function to accomplish. English, as said above, I only have to write my essay and then when exam comes for the class, write about what I like about the class. It makes it much more simpler than I thought. And the two hours makes it more self-helping for me, myself.

What Makes Me, Me!

During my high school years, I hung out with a group I found unique and enjoyable to be around. Those typical people are the "geeks" from what I hear from many preps and jocks. But I guess it is better than having to wear brand clothes or be part of a sport to be wanted in a certain group. We were diverse, from different races to the clothes we wore, no one would even think otherwise. We never had to felt plastic because everything we do, we try to be ourselves without offending other people. I never had to force myself to wear high heels, make up, brand clothes, or put my hair a certain way. They were actually loud and obnoxious but I did not mind, because they were the only people who made me felt comfortable at Sheboygan North High School. However this group only had girls, and I did not grow up only with sisters or around girls.

My whole life, I spent most of the time with my brothers. I cannot partially blame them for why I became somewhat of a game-addict. When I wanted to build a snowman, play baseball, football, basketball, or video games, they had always agree to play with me. My typical clothing are somewhat boyish, but I try to look a little feminine to some extend, for example, I won't wear a dress pants to a formal dance. My brothers always stood up for me, along with my sisters, but I had always felt comfortable talking to my brothers. Now, I am trying to be dependent on myself, then depend on someone, because I know some day I will have to face this world alone.

I know it may seem weird, but I am a girl who hates doing chores and cooking. I was a "spoilt brat" at a young age, and refused to learn how to cook, but I could certainly clean. I just do not have the feel to clean anything if it is not necessary. The only thing I wanted was to advance in life, but to tell the truth, I think I need a break from school. I am not totally focused, especially when I am thinking only about Christmas and the one month break. 

In conclusion, many people say I am a shy and nice person ... that is totally the opposite. I can say I am somewhat shy, but I changed myself because an incident that happened during junior high. I could not trust anyone with the world I said, and it took me more than a year to find a group who make me feel comfortable. I don't really talk about my personal life because I don't want people to pity me. But the only person who actually knew what I was going through was my family and a close friend. And I would not say I am a nice person, I just do not want to show who I really am to them. I was somewhat a bully in elementary school and never wanted to be one again, I guess. 

There is so much more that makes me, but those are the only true reason why I am who I am. I would describe myself as self-center, selfish, game-addict, somewhat shy, and somewhat mean at some times. But it takes more than just a day to change someone, and if possible, I may never be able to change myself. I guess as one of my like-able song, Scars, sung by Papa Roach says, "And my scars remind me that the past is real." But now I am happier because I got rid of my worse four years. 

Looking Back at High School

As a current college student, whenever I look back at High School, I am always reminded of the bad events that had happened in my life. Whenever people tell me that they had the best four years of High School, I wanted to say I had the worst four years of my life. To me, High School taught me that no matter how hard it was, I must pass through this obstacle somehow.  And I actually managed to pass it earlier than most of my peers, even though it was only one semester earlier. Not only do I think about the bad events that occurred during my teens year, I also wonder how High School had and will help me through life. 

I know that I must pass High School in order to go to college because I doubt that any college would never accept a student who does not have a High School Degree or GED. Some High School teachers treat their students as elementary kids rather than their original age. It pains me to see High School student being award a piece of candy for their success. I was one of those many students who have received candy as an awarded for doing something great. Feeling like a 5th grader where if I knew one little thing that the teacher asked, I would get something delicious and to my like in return.

However, not only did I wonder about the way High School teacher award their students, I also wonder whether or not teachers were strict enough on their students. The first day of each class, I always remember teacher saying "I don't accept late work, only if there is an appropriate excuse. " But in the end, the teacher does, and those students who slacks off will pass the class no matter how bad their attendance and behavior is in the class. What makes me angrier is that if those students who slack off is favor by the teacher, the teacher seem to allow the student to pass the class even though they were failing the class.

Not only do I wonder about High School teacher's behavior but also the separation of the groups of student. Under different categories, from being a nerd to a prep, people divide seem to divide themselves from those who think are lower than them. Every human being are born equally and perfect the way they are but to so people, this fact may seem untrue. However I am not as bother with the students as much as I am with the teachers.

After graduating early from high school, I had a feeling of relieve and felt more alive. I could be myself more than hide in the shell that is still today hiding myself. I am glad that I had passed high school no matter what ends I have met. Thankfully this occurred because of the support of my family and guidance counselor. And hopefully when I look back at high school in the future, it would remind me of the time when laughter actually filled the air.

Bike Lane OR Passing Lane? AND THANKFUL

This weeks blog, I am going to write about two subject; first I am going to complain how reckless people drive, and then state all the people whom I am thankful for. This morning, it is the usual 7:58 a.m., which I drive once and a while with my parents. This morning I drove early because my youngest brother forgot to print out one of his assignment and had ask me to get it before North High School started, which was 7:55 a.m. Of course, when I am in the car with my parents my mother always scolds me to drive with the speed limit, so I decided that from now on, I will try to drive 25 on a 25. I guess some people have the "I hate slow people" syndrome. 

So this person decided to pass me by driving 45-50 on a 25 through the bike lane. First of all, this is the not the freeway or highway, where people are allowed to do such a thing. And when people call it the bike lane, I should supposedly think that it is for a biker. It is really irritating, and to tell the truth, he/she was rushing behind the back of my car that I had to drive thirty some miles. And yes I do know his/her license plate, which I want to state aloud in this blog, however I won't. Another situation happened to me earlier in October. On a two way traffic in the city, the person decided to use the other lane to pass me so he/she could stop on the four way stop sign at Superior and 25.

Which I conclude that I like having a narrow street more than a wider street such as now. People uses it to their advantage and how they drive may soon led to fatal accidents. I always wonder, why is there not a police when you wanted to. Just write up that person, and I would feel more ease and happier. However I should not always be angry about a situation for long, since this week is Thanksgiving week. Instead I should be feeling thankful for those who I had help me in life. But the two main person is my parents. 

My mother and father brought me into the world and gave me a roof to live under. And when I think about those who do not have parents, I am happy that I am more fortunate than them. However I do pity them, and hopefully in my life I could help those less fortunate ones. I always wonder how I would survive a night without my parents close by. To be on the subject, I actually appreciate my father more because he supported me through my whole life. 

Thankfully, he is not like other fathers who wish that their daughter would be out of the house soon enough and get marry. My father had seen many situation where the Hmong lady is neglected because she decided not take a better education and is looked down on her husband. And the struggle of such a woman after a possible divorce. So he always lecture my sisters and I to go to school before we marry. With such a father, this mean that I could try to go onto to get either my master or higher level in a career field.

Though there were some hard times in life, I do not feel like I am the most or less fortunate person in the world. I always wanted to sing and act, but my voice was not suitable and I cannot act well. Those are the only thing I feel I am less fortunate to have. But I know one thing I love to do is write and work on mathematical problems. Some people had entered and exited from my life, and I don't mind. I am actually happy some had exited from my life. Even through all the hardship, which was caused by those who exit my life, I made it through those events because of my family and friends. 

November 9th, 2011

After my Calculus class (which is my only class on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday), I went home, like usual and tried writing my History essay which was due the following day. While I was writing my essay, I heard my mother say it was snowing. And I let out of a sign of disappointment because it reminded me that winter was just around the block. Actually I don't dislike snow that much, I do find it crystal pretty when they are not stepped on, as they keep sparkling at dusk and dawn.

I just hate the result after it stops snowing, the roads and sidewalks are slippery. As you walk, it is embarrassing to slip as you walk on the sidewalk or on roads because I know it is weird to see strangers laughing at you. I really don't like the part where people don't SALT their sidewalk, and make everyone slip as they walk by the house. It is really irritating and annoying when I have to look down a sidewalk for ice, and jump over the ice if necessary. And while driving on the road, anyone must drive carefully and under the speed limit if necessary. If the roads are slippery than anyone would assume they are not, it is likely that there will be a car accident. Basically, I don't like to hear the word, SLIP.

But sometime I dislike more is the weather in general. It is plainly dead cold, sometimes under zero degree, and hard wind blowing. After it does finish snowing, it does not mean slippery road or sidewalk but the will to shovel snow. I just shovel once a season, and I don't know why I am not as active as I was when younger, when I shovel almost everyday with my father. But when I was younger, I always had to face those strong winter wind blowing and hitting my face so hard, making my face freeze. I have to always stack piles of clothes to make sure I am warm enough to stay outside. Sometimes when those clothes stay outside for a amount of time, I could  feel the wind blowing right through the clothes, it seems.

The only thing I love about winter is it reminds me that if I am lucky enough, I will get a couple of days break from college. During my high school years, that was what I always wished for, but in the end we always have to make up for it at the end of the school year, which college I don't have to make up. And I love the holiday during winter, I don't know why I love Christmas and the New Years so much. Maybe it reminded me of the good times with my family, when I still thought Santa Claus was still real and how it feel to try to let out a new self during the new year. It just feel cleansing and peaceful to have a long break from school.

I know that some people loves snow, and they tell me constantly how beautiful the snow is. I don't like to argue and disagree with what they like, so I just shake my head and smile. But as I wrote this blog, I knew what the disadvantages and advantages snow has. It seems that SHEBOYGAN PRESS seem excited about the first snow of the fall of 2011, as they posted it on their site. I guess the people in this state loves this weather, but I hope when I grow older, I will leave these snow for the rest of my life. I love warmth than coldness.

"CyberBully"

On Friday, November 4, 2011, I was browsing through the Netflix website, wondering if I could find any movies that could interested me. My eyes was embraced by the title of the movie, Cyberbully. Overall, I found this movie interesting, yet disturbing. Though I have never been a victim of Cyber bully, I was bullied a couple of times in reality, and I always enjoy watching movies that would relate to everyday life. I then decided to click on the movie, and watched it for fully less than two hours. After watching the whole movies, I then realized what made me feel so disturbed when watching the movies. It did not relate to the acting of the Actors and Actresses but certain scenes.

The most disturbing scene in the whole movie was when the mother of the daughter who was being bullied went up to the parents of one of the bullies. Instead of the father feeling that her daughter had a bad experienced on internet, he uses the First Amendment to protect his daughter's behavior. Whatever her daughter had said on the internet is her "Freedom of Speech." Just hearing him say that made me feel disturb and wonder how such a father could ever nurture a child to have proper manner. The Freedom of Speech does not mean anyone can say anything one want, because criticizing the government is a illegal. And so would calling someone a "bitch," "slut," or "Die, I would not even shred a tear" fall under the Freedom of Speech the U.S. government wanted their citizens to say. Freedom of Speech is given to the citizens in regard to have their voice heard when they found a law is unlawfully unfair, such as govern Walker's budget to stop the debts in Wisconsin.

The other disturbing scene was when the friend of the bullied caused the whole cyberbullying situation. She made a false account and wrote negatives things about her friend, such as her friend being infected with HIV. Her actions were the reason why her friend wanted to commit suicide. Though she felt regretful, she would not tell the about the situation until she found it easily to express. This type of friendship always made me feel angry and disappointed because I have experienced those situation from a friend before.

In all, I think cyberbully and bullying should be illegal in all states. For some reason, I feel that it is the cause for almost half of the suicides in the U.S. It made me remember reading about a girl who hanged herself after having heard enough negative comments about herself. Her name, I have forgotten, but her last name was Prince. One death should have shown the world how much negativity some people have for others, and though the bullied committed suicide, they did not feel so useless until somebody made them feel so.

Halloween

This evening I decided to take my niece and nephew Trick-or-Treat because their mother had to work in the afternoon until almost closing time at Walgreens. People started this event a quarter before four until almost seven in the night. I walked almost less than three hours and as of right now, my legs are aching more than ever. I am actually really tired while typing this long blog about the Halloween custom.

During the summer, my niece had told me consistently that she wanted to be a Witch for Halloween. On the other hand, my nephew was in love with Mario, so I told my sister to buy him a Mario costume. My nephew was wearing a Mario costume, meanwhile, my niece was wearing a long dark dress with purple veil surrounding the lower waist of the dress. This costume was consider to be a Witch. The only accessory she was missing was the witch hat, which I could not find anywhere around the house. This made me kind of disappointed because both children was wearing a jacket to keep the cold wind from haunting their body. This fact did not disappoint me because everyone we encountered knew who my nephew was from the hat he was wearing, but since we could not find the witch hat, nobody knew exactly who my niece was.

Before the event started, a week beforehand, I reminded my niece and nephew consistently that they must first say, "Trick or Treat," then after they had received the candy, say "Thank you." I guess it still take times, but I am still proud that they are sometimes able to say Thank You, though sometimes I say in replace for them. I remember what my niece said exactly to my nephew when he did not say Thank You, she yelled at him to say Thank you. Growing up, these two phrases were most remember by me when Trick or Treat came into session.

With only being four and two, it is sometimes confusing to know what house they should approached to received candy. At first they thought that it was any house that they approached, but I kept telling them that it was the house with the lit porch. Soon they got the hang of it, and this made me feel more easy and glad. And this continuous event happened until the struck of seven. I could not take both my niece and nephew, nor could my feet hang onto forty more minutes. Sometimes my niece and nephew were misbehaving that I had to pull them aside and tell them clearly, it was either Trick or Treat OR go home. This made them somewhat sad and disappointed, but I always end up taking them to get more candy.

It has always been a Halloween tradition for those little kids to dress up as someone who they have always wanted to. Also they had to know two certain phrases to show respect to those are willing to give candy to them. It is always known by regular trick-or-treaters that only houses whose porches were lit would only pass out candy. And certainly how long they would have to time to get all the candy they desired, which was more than two hours, less than three hours. The only thing I could not exactly do was carve a Jack-o-Lantern for the event. At least I know for sure, I would be able to have a good night sleep because both my mind, arms and legs are falling asleep. But though the pain aches, I still love Halloween and the creativity people provide for their Trick-or-Treaters.